11 Comments
User's avatar
Sharron Bassano's avatar

A powerful opening to a longer narrative. This is full of menace, a perfect set up for what promises to be a very difficult story. OR, in my opinion, it could stand alone, as is, as micro-fiction — you have clear characters, clear setting, an obvious back story, a conflict, an open end. You could allow the reader to fill in the blanks. Either way, excellent, CJ!

Expand full comment
palmisanocj@yahoo.com's avatar

Thank you, Sharron. I appreciate your comment!

Expand full comment
beth Kane's avatar

This gives me chills and makes me nauseous. Very powerful for such a brief piece

Expand full comment
palmisanocj@yahoo.com's avatar

Thank you, Beth. I appreciate your comment!

Expand full comment
Wade Terry's avatar

I’m always amazed at how the innocence of children can be shattered and how adults can be so intimidating that nothing is said. I can’t wait for the next part, hoping there is a next part. Daisy needs revenge.

Expand full comment
palmisanocj@yahoo.com's avatar

Thank you, Wade. I appreciate your comment!

Expand full comment
Lisa A Dickson's avatar

Wow, so many lauers in such a brief piece.👏

Expand full comment
palmisanocj@yahoo.com's avatar

Thank you, Lisa. I appreciate your comment!

Expand full comment
heron's avatar

This is a completely convincing illustration of the ordinary, and horrific, nature of abuse.

Expand full comment
palmisanocj@yahoo.com's avatar

Thank you, Heron. I appreciate your comment!

Expand full comment
User's avatar
Comment removed
Apr 29, 2024
Comment removed
Expand full comment
palmisanocj@yahoo.com's avatar

Thanks, Lu. I appreciate your comment!

Expand full comment